


Let Me Down Slowly

by problematicInsomniac



Series: Songs For The Sides [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Established Relationship, Implied drinking, M/M, Mentions of Patton - Freeform, broken relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 10:14:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19461877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/problematicInsomniac/pseuds/problematicInsomniac
Summary: "This night is cold in the kingdomI can feel you fade awayFrom the kitchen to the bathroom sink andYour steps keep me awakeDon't cut me down, throw me out, leave me here to wasteI once was a man with dignity and graceNow I'm slipping through the cracks of your cold embraceSo please, please"-Alec Benjamin





	Let Me Down Slowly

Roman layed in their bed, no longer really their bed. The left side empty, the right side filled by an empty man who hasn't slept correctly in weeks.

He listened to the silence in the room. The fan on high, making slight creaking noises every 30-45 seconds. He knew for a fact, he had counted. The waving of the papers left on the dresser and the little posters hanging on the wall.  
  
He remembered when they first moved in together, how they fought over whether posters were or werent allowed on the walls.

_"Roman, we're out of college now, why do you need them?" Roman wrapped his arms around Logan, kissing his cheek. "Because, Lo, they give me inspiration and they are nice looking. What's wrong with having nice things to look at?" He could see the smile on his face, shaking his head. "Hey, give me some credit. I managed to compromise and bring only seven_ _posters instead of fifteen."_

_"Fifteen?!" Logan turned in Roman's arms to face him, letting his hands fall on his muscular chest. "How'd you fit so many in your dorm without anyone noticing?" Roman only smiled at him, kissing him on the lips as a response._

Since the beginning the two had had their differences, small spats over dumb things which they never actually let get to them. They were more of teasing fests then actual arguments. They had loved each other too much to let something like that get to them, to get to their relationship. Until they started turning into actual arguments. Once jokes now became swords they threw at each other in their seemingly never-ending battles. Many nights Roman found himself alone and seething from an argument, which red hot anger would soon turn to tears as he waiting for his boyfriend to walk back through the door.

_Logan sighed before carefully unlocking and opening the door. He tried to make as little noise as possible, to avoid catching Roman's attention, only to find him asleep on the couch instead. His eyes were still puffy and red from crying, and Logan couldn't help but feel a twinge in his heart as he approached his sleeping form. He carefully swept his bangs away and lightly kissed his forehead, before going to shower and change for work._

Eventually, though, their battles fell flat as they began to stop talking in the first place. Logan began to avoid Roman all together, and whenever he tried to surprise him or spend time with his boy he was always busy. 

"Roman, I'm _busy_." The words stung and echoed through his mind as he laid over the covers, unable to sleep. He missed him so bad, the dark feelings spread throughout his entire being. Although physically there, Roman knew he wasn't there. He was no longer his boyfriend, back to the stoic person he knew when he had first met him and barely paid any attention to him. He remembers the first time they met, it had been a story straight out of those modern day cinderella knock off movies. He really met him through his friend, Patton, but _met_ him at the school's senior prom. They danced together and talked and enjoyed the night throughly, but thanks to the mask he wore, only Patton knew who he was.

_"Why are you even wearing a mask to prom?" Roman asked, walking along the curb. The masked prince chuckled lightly, taking Roman's hand gently. "It was so I could spend at least one night with you before I graduate."_

Roman remembers searching for him, trying to find his prince. Just as he was ready to give in, Logan finally revealed himself at graduation and Roman's impulsivity kicked in as he kissed him in front of both of their families and friends.

A smile ghosted Roman's lips as the memory faded and he began to hear something outside. He listened to the movement in the kitchen; The fridge opening for the eighth time that night, the clink of a bottle on the countertops. Now focusing on something outside of the room he's trapped himself in, he counted how many times the fridge opened (twelve times) until he heard Logan's stumbling footsteps down the hall. Every time he thinks for a moment that maybe, just maybe, Logan will walk into their room and lay down next to him. Possibly, by a sliver of a chance, pull him in close, even for a moment, and kiss him just one more time. But every time, including now, he passes their door to head to the bathroom.  
  
Thats usually where the tears start, usually he'd drown in his own sobs as he tried _so hard_ not to let Logan hear. He didn't know why, he just couldn't let him know. As of late, though, it seemed like he was all dried up. He had cried all the tears he had, it felt like, but that didn't stop the terrible feeling you feel while you cry over someone close to you.  
  
He wasn't enough for Logan. Roman would never be good enough for him. He knew that. He knew that no matter how hard he tried, he would never meet Logan's needs or wants or expectations. And yet he'd continue to stare at the empty spot next to him and dream up a future where maybe, just maybe, he was good enough for the person he was in love with still.


End file.
